Citizens of the Patterns
Citizens of the Patterns
Theses little guys and girls or the “ Citizens of the patterns” are the little guys that obviously make up some of our patterns, they are cute and a little evil, they can all live/die happily in their pattern kingdoms and are proud to represent Spider Skull Clothing – or they are just a bit funny.
EleMental . . . a normal day in the EleMental Kingdom. Carbon kinda hates the use of his image, hes pooping out diamonds, I told him that’s special, he said I was special. Uranium has his rod in his hand, he likes it there and is very proud of how big and glowy it is and he likes to insert it into new places. Oxygen will be upset later, his little friend is proper dead hes just not realized It yet, he knows everyone needs oxygen so thought he could give him some of his and make him better but he really just got some hose pipe and a funnel and smothered the guy to death – its funnier if you don’t tell him. Nitrogen just chills and grows, he concocts all sorts of fertilizers to increase his potential, giggles a lot of mumbles. Plutonium is riding a nuke coz what else would he be doing? It looks like fun - he will probably use it to blow s**t up , I’d want to blow soo much s**t up too. Hydrogen is a little fire starter and just spreads it everywhere- really badly it comes out of his head hands and feet, you can see the insanity on his face, he says he is spreading the work of Satan id say it was fire. Neon is being neon with his fav word – Moist – enough said. Silicon is filled with silicon, she likes helping women who want bigger boobs, id like some silicone . . . Helium has issues, they will be over soon.
Suicide Sugar Cubes . . . they need new names, maybe you people can name them if you want, they don’t care, they gave up on everything a long time ago. Dissolvie threw himself under the tap and is enjoying watching himself disappear down the drain, Gratery went for the slow and painful method, looks cool though so points to him for that one, Impaley jumped off the roof of his gingerbread house ( coz that’s what all sugar cubes live in, they also ride crystal sugar unicorns down the valley to to launch themselves into the mouths of the unsuspecting horses, its suicide and the crystal sugar unicorns are dicks for teasing the horses coz they end up in a right mess after eating a few of them, I digress . . . ) and on to a massive metal spike, he is very pleased with his landing and hopes to leave his corpse there to become a statue. Shooty has blew his brains out, he now feels peace, I bet the bullet left a really cool tunnel through the middle of his head then a nasty blown out exit wound on the other side, wish I could draw in 4D on clothes. Smashie smashed his own head in, I dunno if it was one whack or several but he did good. Stabbie has went for the stomach, he knows it will take longer to die and he is happy about it he also likes the size of the blade he used. Hangy has hung himself badly, he has no idea if he has a neck so is going to wait up there till he dies of something else, he doesn't care he thinks he might be dead and suspended in animation until the point he was supposed to die as decided by the mighty LSD, god to the cubes?! Clipper used a clipper or other non branded or branded lighter to ignite himself it was easy. . . Nutters.
Killer Spiders . . . ermm. . yeah . . Eyeball collects eyballs, but just the left ones, he burrys the right ones for religious reasons. The Strangler likes CPR he only strangles to save them after it, then he will do it again and again and again till its dead dead, kinda sent him crazy. Big Tooth uses it like a dart to impale insects while flying through the air, he is master of the combo tricks, landing 24 bugs in one throw, that’s the kingdom record, to e fair he iss the only big tooth so holds all the records in that category. Bitey Ball is the little brain sucker, he aint a zombie but he like to believe he is. The Guy Munching On a Fly is doing just that, his girlfriend keeps bugging his tits so hes gone to his place to get away from her. The guy with the eyeball and bits hanging out his mouth isn’t real I just made him up, hes just a drawing, if you look really close he looks a bit flat. Spewey is gross, he regurgitates his victims to roll himelf in the gooey mess and leaves it to harden like a protective shell on his body then goes out killing for more fun. Snappy is making new pieces for his next game of snap!
Spider Skull . . . The tiny, possibly carnivorous spiders have found a new evil lair from which they command total destruction of all things. The brain cavity is large enough to hold billions of the tiny little buggers inside in a massive spiderball which can then be sent out to eat its way through anything in its path. The superspiderball is out at the moment destroying and possibly recruiting or just eating other insects, the little guys left are on lookout just to protect the King and Queen, theres probably still a few million of them plastered all around the inside of the skull for extra protection . . . they are a bit paranoid and don’t like to feel lonely, less than 500,000 in a huddle and they explode from fear of being left alone.
These are the nuggets of info on the citizens at time of print, we are aware they may go off to have further adventures and encourage this wholeheartedly. Please let us know of anything else they've been up to, we might add the best ones in here :)